It’s been long awaited that I fully write this out, that I share this side of me in hopes to help another in these dark times. Have you ever felt so deeply hurt, so deeply torn, that you thought your existence wasn’t worth it. Have you ever allowed someone to control your every move, your every thought. Have you ever felt like the dark hole you were in was only getting darker and you were only getting deeper into what we call now a days, depression. Well…. I have. I’m not sure how I ended up at this point, but what I do know is, I surpassed it. I survived what was the hardest moment to handle. I became stronger, I became wiser, and most importantly I overcame it. I’m still working on myself; my decisions, my emotions, my thoughts. But I am here today. I’m alive, I’m breathing.
I share this with you not to put a bad name on anyone, but to open your eyes. YOU are so very important in this world. You cannot by any means let anyone take the wheel of your life. You must always put yourself first. No, it’s not about selfishness, but instead about taking charge of your life because you my friend are the only one responsible for the outcome of your life. You may blame another for something they did to you, but how you react to it is what will lead you to the life you create.
January 1, 2017 my life changed in a way I never imagined, I thought my life was over. I thought I was going to die. Not sure if at this point you understand where exactly I’m coming from, but let’s just say I was able to walk out of a fight – I walked out with a sore body, a broken house, and art left on my face for the world to see. I stood strong and didn’t hide, I let the world see what was left of me. At this point in time, I felt like my soul had died. I felt like there was nothing left of me. I could vividly see the images of the all the fights, I could hear him screaming at me, I could hear myself asking for it to come to a stop, but he just kept reacting. He kept going on and on. No matter how calmly I asked, he just wouldn’t stop. For months I thought this was it. I thought I’d never be able to fight through it.
The girl who was once right here in this photo, she’s not the same girl she was in this exact moment. The girl in this photo is the one who thought she was defeated….
Today, I’m standing as strong as I’ve built myself to be and I am proud to say that when I look at this photo, I see art, art of destruction. But this art was also the kind that made me stand tall and say “I AM WORTHY, I AM WHOLE, YOU WILL NOT DEFEAT THE WARRIOR THAT WAS CREATED.”
For those of you who even think for ONE second that you can allow this kind of damage to break you, think again! This is what creates you! Don’t let life’s hits make you think anything less of yourself.
The worst is surely over, but my story isn’t finished. Stay tuned 🙏🏼
• Empower yourself, be one with the universe. ✨